Carl's Words

Carl spoke at Tamara's funeral service. This is what he said.

I’m so broken right now I can’t even think.  When my big sister left for college I cried for weeks because I missed her so much.  Now that my big sister has left for heaven I find myself wondering how I will ever stop crying because I miss her so much.  She was my best friend growing up.  We would play tennis every afternoon in our driveway and the neighbors driveway, using the street as our tennis net.  We would throw lawn darts straight up in the air and then run for our lives.  Tamara and I fought with the best of them, too.  She would run around in circles and chase me and attack me if I ever disagreed with her or made her mad.  But when I was scared she would tuck me in bed next to her and hold me close until I fell asleep.

Now, when my heart hurts, I feel just a little bit closer to her as I hold and love on her children.  I see so much of her in them.  She loved her kids with all the strength and passion that she had.  

If I could share one thing with everyone, it would be to love.  Don’t let the little things be so big - don’t even let the big thing be big.  Hug your loved ones - look them in the eyes every chance that you get and tell them that you love them.  Life is so short, and none of us are promised tomorrow.  I would give anything to tell Tamara how much she really meant to me.  And to keep telling her until I knew that she understood.  Take advantage of every opportunity you are given to love and forgive and love some more, so that you can live with no regrets.

Even though I ache so badly, I am peaceful as well.  I have no doubt that God is in control. I have no doubt that He is faithful to complete the good works that He has begun.  And I have no doubt about the fact that my sister is hand in hand with Jesus right now, joining that great cloud of witnesses that surround us on this earth.  I miss her so very much, and I always will, but I know that I will see her again and I am so thankful for the peace the Lord provides.

Carl said that he learned this from Popi.  Whenever Popi is with Carl he looks Carl in the eyes and tells him he loves him.  It has always meant so much to Carl.  Now he wants to make sure that whenever he leaves anyone that he looks them in the eyes and tells them how much he loves them.  It only takes a moment - and we have learned what we always knew, you never know when it will be the last one that you have with them.